FRIENDSHIP IN ADOLESCENCE
Identity formation, is the development of the distinct
personality of an individual in which
individual characteristics are formed and the person is recognized
as a unique individual. The question, "Who am I?" is pertinent
during adolescence and this process defines the
individual to others and themselves.
Identity formation, begins in childhood and gains importance during adolescence.. Faced with physical growth, sexual maturation, and
career choices, adolescents must accomplish the task of integrating their prior
experiences and characteristics into a stable identity. Psychologist Erikson
coined the phrase ‘identity crisis’ to describe the temporary instability and
confusion adolescents experience as they struggle with alternatives and
choices. To cope with the uncertainties of this stage, adolescents may over
identify with heroes and mentors, fall in love, and bond together in cliques..
Friendships play a major role in the lives of adolescents. A
circle of caring and supportive friends can help an adolescent's transition to
a successful adult. They get a
sense of security and comfort in being with others going through the same
experiences.
Still, forming and maintaining friendships during adolescence
can be challenging. Peer pressure – good and bad – often affects decisions
young people make.
Parents, can help young people learn how to make and keep good friends by:
1.
Being
warm and supportive, staying connected and actively listening to your child.
Don’t be judgmental. This will help her/him to be more open to you.
2.
Being
a good role model is very important. Parents who are keen to spend time with their
own friends are more likely to have children with lots of healthy friendships. It’s
important for your child to see you looking out for your friends.
3.
Teach
your child that friendship is a two-way thing. There must be give and take in
the relationship ( mutual sharing).
4.
Praising
teens when you see them being fair, trusting and supportive of others
encourages them to keep working on those positive social traits.
5.
Think about your child’s interests and strengths. Based on
this, you could look for new extracurricular activities for your child or encourage
your child to join a club, sporting team or social group.
6.
Make sure your child feels
comfortable inviting friends home and
give her/him space when she does. Make friends with your child's friends. Being
the ‘favourite aunt/uncle’ of your child’s friends will bring you get closer to
your child.
7.
Don't
restrict them to speak to teens of opposite sex. Teach them to respect the
other gender as well.
8.
Most
importantly teach your adolescent to say 'No', to his friends, when he is put
in a situation to do what he is not comfortable doing or against his value
system. This will help him deal with peer pressure for wrong reasons.
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